jrcthegodlessheathen:

As I wrap my hand around this flower, rapidly blooming in my hand
Like love in its’ greenest form, a daisy oh so grand
The flower shyly hides as I raise it to your smile
Its’ petals slowly form a crown around your head for miles
The epitome of womanhood lies before me,
Her aura shrouds my entire being like heaven so sweet
All I can do is attempt to appease a goddess,
For you, I will pick every flower in this forest
So I can wrap each one with golden seams
While planting them in your garden of dreams

I had to finally grow-up into debt when I paid $800 a class for self-esteem? Taking class-after-class for this cost is the American dream that I will never regret. Or was it when I had to learn about death and had to grow-up when I was four years old when my mom slammed the door in my face and never came out of the bathroom for weeks washing her face and crying after her mother died. I lost all my innocence on an island in the middle of nowhere when I was blacked- out- drunk and don’t even remember. All my life I’ve been judged very harshly for this one mistake. I don’t know why people treat me like this but it’s too bad that my writing teacher is almost the only one that could ever spare the time to understand me and saw anything in me. Before listening to rumors about me and judging me why don’t you try going one day without talking bad about someone in your life? Maybe you should look in the mirror and see your own mistakes and fix your own problems instead of always acting like I’m the problem and twisting everything around. I’ve been talked down to like some deviant my whole life just because I’m poor and if you think I don’t notice because I don’t say anything you are all very wrong. The feelings I have make me so sad when I think about being bullied and forgotten like I’m dead when I’m alive, is pretty sad in life. This is how humans care? They seem to care more about what they can’t have instead of the people that are here now and alive. It’s hard beating the odds even though my parents were never very good role models and still trying to go to college was a huge deal to me but not anymore. Nobody thinks I deserve a nice life too out of spite. I’ve been called crazy daisy but it’s  not really funny to always think that about me, when I’m only human no matter if I have o.c.d. and count everything constantly and have to make sure everything is in the right millions of different color coded  organizations, so that the colors can be in the right possible  matching combinations. It is only that I’m different then the people you meet everyday doesn’t mean I’m not rational and smart it just means I don’t think the same way you do! We’re all mistakes put on this earth for a reason they say. So this is written to the first mean teacher that never wanted to help me get ahead because she was jealous I was working for a famous person and told me I wasn’t really a real writer and accused me of cheating  and said until I went to school for fourteen years I couldn’t be a writer. What you might see as a tangent is pure genius to me. I’ve been awake longer then the average human writing until the sunrise, practice makes perfect not college classes. The truth is there really isn’t any second chances in America.